Friday, June 27, 2008

Columbus holly Laissez-Passer

BC-

For those fleeing Iraqis who are seeking a turbo entry into the US or Europe as refugees have we got some news for you? Just show up at the UN office door steps in either Jordan or Syria and tell them that you fear for your life because you have converted into Christianity, and we can assure you that in a period of two months some church, with the help of the holly spirits, will get you a granted entry without any further delays!!

As we write this post there are 320 Iraqi Shiite families with children, waiting to be flown out of Iraq and into the US because they have been converted into Christianity by missionaries. Eric, who is one of the leading cult human-traffickers in our country, says that he would like to see his effort to finally bear its fruits. The Shiite-Christians have been converted out of pure ‘faith and dedication to Jesus Christ's command’ and not solely for their personal interests, says Eric.

Mostly from mid-southern Iraq and impoverished the Shiite families will finally find peace in the teachings of Christ, adds Eric who is a thin tall man of 37 years with fixated flat, placed smile upon thine face.

A lady with two children has recently joined her husband in Sweden from Jordan after her husband converted into Christianity, and his church there managed to execute his wife’s entry papers in record of 30 days! Another lady we know in Syria, who has been trying to entre into the Denmark for the past 2 years is thinking to convert into Christianity so she could expedite her departure, and when I asked her if the UN would look into the matters of those Iraqis who would, for example, convert into Hinduism and if there is any Hindu temple to help them move into the US or Europe, she snapped back at me and said ‘what Hindu? This is not a religion! Hindus worship dirty cows’ and she left angrily. I got a bit sad; I like cows and I even prefer them over some people.

So I guess it is high time for Jesus of Nazareth and low time for Mohammed the Hashemite, and for you Iraqis who happen to pass by a church, just think that ‘in name of the Father, Son, and Holy Spirit’ can get you along, long way ;)

Conversely, many Iraqis that travelled through Baghdad airport could not get a grasp to the reality of seeing loads of Indians, Filipinos and African workers that are travelling on Iraqi passports!! And many of us wonder how could the interior ministry issue passports to those workers that speak zero Arabic or Kurdish?! When we asked an official about this trend he said that most of those are working for the Americans (military regime) at their camps and he thinks those passports worth lots of money!!!

On a different note, the capital could reasonably pass for ‘Fort Baghdad’ for the enormous amount of Iraqi armed forces in the streets, the American junta on the other hand is hardly seen anywhere around in the city. Baghdadis are talking about returning, to a slight degree, to Saddam’s days before the war in terms of some what OK security but the difference is that they see Baghdad has turned into a wreck with zero electricity in blistering summer heat, but they are ‘thankfully kissing their hands on both sides – Iraqi proverb’ for being alive.

Friday, June 06, 2008

Fissure: The Liberators Army

Fedayeen Petraeus (Sahwa’s Baathsits and ex-Qaeda) have confirmed that a medium-sized faction of Al Sahwa has split up and formed the Liberators Army, which according to a Sahwa spokesman of El Taji, it is an army that is made up of reborn Baathists and Saddamists!!

Since the American Junta in Iraq embraced a hand-picked Baathists and remnants of Al-Qaeda in 2006 to form Al Sahwa in order to counterweight the Shiite resistance, the Sahwa have been all along a precarious state of affairs due to its core nature. However, and as the head of the American military regime is due to depart, and the head of the invaders – Mr. Bush - time is up, the arena may appear to be wide open for more political opportunism in the months to come.

The invaders have already warned Al Maliki that the Armageddon ‘occupation alliance pact’ that is currently under negotiation with the invaders, will be used as a political tool by his enemies if not signed soon, which may further destabilize the fragile political apparatus of the green zone, however, the formation of the Baathists Liberators Army did not come in any better time to vindicate the invaders’ argument!!!

The head of the invaders seems utterly adamant to seal the occupation alliance pact prior to the official kicking-off of the American presidential campaign for 2008

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