Saddamania

BC-

The ‘red-headed’ Michael E. O'Hanlon of the Brookings Institution has once again trumped up the ideational of ‘Voluntary’ Ethnic Relocation in Iraq, and has drawn associated-comparison parallel lines by the means of unassociated-comparatively, top to bottom demographic examples that are far from the reality of our country – why not if Mr. O'Hanlon himself is sitting just as far!

Mr. O'Hanlon has diced a slice of reality to collage off our sordid abstract tableau when he brain-stormed a vision of voluntary ethnic relocation as a concept to replace the current coerced ethnic relocation – perhaps terminologies could make wonders in black and white texts but they fall a million years short to the current Murphy’s laws.

Mr. O'Hanlon has neatly softened the coerced relocation of our people (our daily Salem’s sorcerers’ killings) to ‘voluntary’ relocation – perhaps with the help of real estate companies! (what a laugh) And he adds: “Confederacy, along with ‘safe passage’, ‘property swapping’, ‘job-creation programs’ and ‘oil revenue sharing!’ provides at least a plausible path forward”.

Any one who could write a paragraph about the current Iraq like the above-mentioned deserves an F and disqualification from the Political Science Department, unless, of course, Mr. O'Hanlon has written it when he was vacationing in Hawaii while indulging on licking toads’ bellies!

Today our shambled country pertains not only of Saddamists but we, too, have the Takfiris, Al Mahdis, Al Badrs, Al Hakims, the Beshmarga, the Death Squads, plane gangsters, 20 other businessmen’s militias, the resistance, the curse of the invasion and all are well represented in our beautiful parliament while tearing each other to pieces on daily bases for the bread crumbs; conversely, Mr. O'Hanlon is talking about ‘safe passage’, ‘property swapping’, ‘job-creation programs’ and ‘oil revenue sharing’!! which really sounds like a naïve boy scout’s ideas at some summer camp.

Do we have ‘honorable’ and formidable bureaucratic mechanism to overlook the allocation of lands, because if we had such bureaucratic force then we would not have been in this mess to start with? And does any know how deep-rooted the Iraqis feel towards their fathers or mothers’ lands?

One hake of a business this would be: voluntary ethnic relocation? I can just imagine the business barons to include real estate who would step in to profit from this lucrative idea: Uhem, say dude, you help me to ‘voluntarily’ relocate my neighbor and you’d get your ‘share’; you see, my son is getting married and I need that extra land!! Needled to say the social codification that the ‘relocatees’ will carry with them for eternity.

If the invaders and their siblings are trying to institutionalize Saddam’s past evil works without resolving the real cause of the problem just to stay in power then I have one thing to say to them: Have you no sense of decency?

Kindly drop us!

Al Tarrar:

On the light of dropping Venezuelan Oil industries by a private company in the US due to name calling by Mr. Chavez with respects to Mr. Bush.

Dear Halliburton,

Mr. Bush is a devil, liar and alcoholic. Kindly drop our Oil and go home!

Crack

Security Source – Exclusive:

It is increasingly evident that an armed power struggle between a Wahhabi-style Baathists and the Takfiris has already commenced in the western region and, in fact, has reached an all out confrontation.

The development is seen as a prelude to establish a single formidable front line after both the Baathists and the Takfiris have succeeded in gaining political grounds in recent months.

Last week a Takfiri group related to the so-called Al Qaeda has slain an infamous Baathist resistance leader.

One active Baahtist said to BC: with ‘these people’ the honey moon is over!

דוובל שטנדרד

BC -

The latest report on the Israelis entanglement with the current affairs of Iraq has further drowned the Bush Admin and its friends in the murkiest morass pond in the region.

While the Israelis were accusing Iran of helping the militant group of Hezbollah in Lebanon, Israelis were simultaneously helping the militant group of Beshmarga in Kurdistan.

This Israeli double standard casts a doubt on the true nature of peace that Israel is aiming for in the region. Also, when we take into consideration the definition of the Bush Admin for ‘harboring terror’, then Israel is harboring terror in our country, and those Israeli private terror consultants should be blacklisted as part of the ‘war on terror' similar to those of Al Takfiris.

Perhaps this Israeli industry (training of militants) has becoming profitable through out the years due to its extensive experience in countries like El Salvador, Nicaragua, Panama, Costa Rica and even a marketing exercise scheme for Kashmir, India. However, over here this particular industry is tremendously devastating, and its presence can bee seen as a living proof that the invaders are indirectly favoring certain militias to destabilize our country.

Soroka’s curse and bless of the week

Curse:

1. Our ‘grand’ PM for being delighted that he continues to receive control of other provinces as we get our country back from the hands of the Baath dictatorship, while there were more than 6600 tortured related deaths in Baghdad alone during the last two months!

2. The Pope and the Takfiris, as both have proven to belong to dark ages ‘examples’

3. The Thai coup leader for conducting a ‘democratic’ coup d’etat!

Honorary curse to Kahlilzad for granting a Baathist businessman in Amman, Jordan the permission to form a new Baath party.

Bless:

1. Australian Federal Court for having declared the Aborigines are the traditional owners of Perth, Australia and are given the right to hunt and fish in the area.

2. State of California, USA for suing 6 nos. car manufacturers for global warming

3. Anousha Ansari; the first Iranian – American woman in orbit

Honorary bless to SEGOLENE ROYAL for being the first French woman to run for presidency.

Self-determination, not self-preservation.

BC -

The current sectarian-affiliated political parties, and specially those represent the southern region constituents, have been rather busy with crafting out legislations to grant bigger role for the southern region by introducing a governing self-rule apparatus similar to that of Kurdistan. Also, they seem quite certain that their vision will secure ‘their’ children future – and not ‘Iraqi’ children future! - from the re-occurrences of past dark histories.

In fact, if there was one thing that had been destructive and will always be so to the Iraqi children future is the recursive self-preservation mental map that is encoded in our politicians’ mind road.

Autonomies in a country that is eternally drowned in monumental debts will simply turn into fragmentary bureaucracies that will require bigger fiscal spending, as well as inflationary composite budgets that no Iraqi ‘national’ government will ever be able to grasp.

The trend will turn even sourer when the entertained local legislations will be based on nepotism and segmentary benefits – as a living example of today, to adjust to people’s needs. This will further complicate the political performances when voters begin to turn to ‘Maharajas’ rather than achievers in times of regional elections. And, consequently, the local voter will become a significant factor during the national elections to keep those Maharajas in power regardless of their deficiencies; and, finally, we end up with a Muslim Indians Dilemma (at random population explosion!) as politicians literally buy ‘paupers’ voters to keep their parliamentary seats. Of course, in the past the ancient Britain had made sure to dismantle great India through this channel, but that’s a different topic.

Conversely, today’s Kurdistan is a thousand years away from Catalonia, Spain. The northern region is plagued with warlords and trades tycoons that even the normal Kurds are sick of it. Nothing can be done there without a big-gun pre-approval. Also, Turkey is a serious neighbor with serious issues that should not be overlooked.

And then who will protect those self-ruled regions, regional armies similar to the Beshmarga and Fedayeen Saddam (Fedayeen Abu Der’ra!)? And is Iraq ready for segmented demography to rebuild its infrastructure? If Oil is the winning joker then please reconsider. This commodity has already been sold to its last drop; also, let us remind the numerous ‘men of religion’ that as per the ‘Islamic laws’ fuel and food are for all Iraqis.

If there is a way forward, and there is a way, then it’s got to be ‘Iraq’ self-determination. But first we need to resolve the political pending issues with the ‘untouchables’ before the invaders race us to them!

The Iraqis have elected a functioning body to function and to unit the warring ‘national’ political parties not to settle scores.

work out the differences and not the sects
work out the common goals and not the personal goals
work out the common grounds and not the battle grounds
work out the national interests and not the foreign interests

When the government commences to govern a structured functioning body that has a ‘gripping’ effect mechanism then it is our responsibility – the Iraqi people - to percolate out the invaders amongst us and we, wholeheartedly, look forward to that moment. Mind you, no guns or bombs will be needed for our task!

But first, they must govern!

Lekk Makku Hiji Dawla!.. (there is no country as such)

Al-Tarrar:

When the Cabinet met this week the Secretariat of the Board found out that the Prime Minister was in Iran, the two numbers of VP of the PM - the Kurdish and Arab, were traveling overseas, and the two numbers Vice President of the Republic were voyaging too in foreign lands. Finally, the Secretariat of the Board realized that ‘to his surprise’ 22 of the total 31 ministers (men and women) were also scattered outside our country and consequently the meeting was postponed!!

And of course this dinosaurian bureaucracy is fully paid by us.

Allah Kareem!

Expiry Date: ... Expired!

End of Story

Official statement by Mr. Zalmay Khalilzad:

“There has been a lot of dialogue and panic and pain between the Iraqis after the announcement of the Kurdistan decree No. 60 on the question of the Iraqi flag.

Article 12 of the Iraqi Constitution on the map of the road relating to the flag of Iraq stipulates any decision on Iraqi national symbols to be taken by the Iraqi people as a whole through the established constitutional procedures. The United States supports these procedures and confirms once again its commitment to Iraq's unity and territorial integrity and sovereignty.

God bless the people of Iraq.”

Zalmay Khalilzad - Ambassador of the United States of America in Iraq

Unwrapping Abu Ghraib

After handing in the Abu Ghraib prison back to the Iraqi government I believe we can shed some light on the termites gnawing issue of the Abu Ghraib scandal.

Social identities are pretty much expressed in material and visual culture; however, when both are combined then ‘wrapping’ to protect those identities will be the logical outcome.

The conduct of the American interrogators at Abu Ghraib prison was in fact to unwrap and ‘de-tattooing’ the cultural identity of the Iraqi people by the ‘redeployment’ of human bodies within new social landscape.

Changing the lines of a body will result in removing the ethnic identities which have been transcended for many generations through a religion of book, kinships, villages and towns trades and borders. The final ‘subjectified objective’ is to reshape the ‘personhood’ of a society in order to prevail and to eventually exercise power.

The humans pyramid shape of exposed anuses of Iraqi prisoners was an interpretation of Americans defiance through associating excrement discharge to their experience. By doing so the Americans have blatantly challenged the world community with their unpopular war; also, the pyramid represented a new collective order that have replaced the old one. That particular piece of display perhaps demonstrated the unfathomable abyss of the Americans psychoanalytical ‘climax’.

The Abu Ghraib style interrogation was never about gaining information about the resistance. Most people in this sort of biz know very well the ‘proper’ ways for garnering such data.

Body mutilation, humiliation etc. had been for thousands years part of ancestral comportment to redefine, punish or introduce new social orders in peoples’ lives. In mankind early dwellings, pledging to new social roles required isolation, genital mutilation and even animals threat to achieve embodiment of social identities or to re-group social genders. The body in the end becomes a ‘political field’.

Emotions and possessions are well secured underneath the cloths. And when a person is stripped off its protection then he/she will enter into a rite of passage that is dictated by the powerful (those who possess power to strip others).

The stripped body can be trained, tortured, carried out tasks and even to perform ceremonies and emit social signals. The powerful will not only seek control over the redefined social bodies but to exhibit to the rest of the communities the self-granted power they possess over others, and in absence of ancestral or natural birth laws.

Non-Iraqi recruits for southern Iraq

BC-

Security Source (exclusive):

It is increasingly evident that the invaders authority is relying on non-Iraqi military-task personnel for the Iraqi army units that are stationed in southern Iraq for logistics reasons, and mainly to counter the Shiites influence of Jaish Al Mahdi as well as the Iranians.

The local people are referring to recruits with non-Iraqi accent in the army units and more closer to Arabian Peninsula accent and even Egyptian! Also, there are bases and specifically in south of the city Hilla, where most of those ‘mercenaries’ are stationed - areas are yet out of our PM’s jurisdiction.

During the Ottoman occupation of Iraq similar juntas were imbedded into the Iraqi forces, which were brought from Bosnia – Al Inkeshariya – and who were famous for their black head-band. Later on Al Inkeshariya turned into a major obstacle and a big headache for the Ottoman in Iraq. Also, the Brits recruited plenty of Indians into the ‘Iraqi army’ – lower units – when they were trapped in Nassariya by the southern Iraqi resistance (head of tribes who opposed the British admin. laws) back in the early 20th century.

The current trend demonstrates that the invaders are still walking that thin political stave line, which will make our PM’s chances to gain control of the situation ever slimmer.

The southerner Shiites believe that those mercenaries – similar to Saddam’s recruits prior to 2003 - are used in counter-productive fashion.

One source who managed to get somewhat closer to those bases has referred to a “pan-Arab atmosphere” amongst the units!

Conde’s Home Ironing Board

Deep Throat:

During Ms Rice’s last visit to Iraq, and precisely on her brief detour to Kurdistan, she met with the PM to deliver a warning and we quote her: “We are Ironing Saddam’s clean shirt for November (thanksgiving day). Until then if you couldn’t pull it through then we will make Saddam wear it again or have it tailored for someone of his size!” unquote.

Our PM has until the fourth Thursday of November 2006 to sort it out…poor Monty!!


- BC wonders could this be the last Ramadan and Eid for Mr. Al Malaki at the GZ?!